자기 규제

재택 예방 비디오 교육 시리즈

YWCA Spokane 직원은 친밀한 파트너 가정 폭력과 관련된 문제를 둘러싼 지역 사회 교육 및 인식을 높이는 데 초점을 맞춘 독특한 온라인 참여 기회를 만들기 위해 함께 모였습니다. 11부작 비디오 시리즈는 다양한 배경이나 현재 지식 기반을 갖춘 개인을 위한 흥미롭고 교육적인 콘텐츠를 제공합니다. 비디오와 블로그 게시물은 시청자에게 YWCA 스포케인 지지자들을 개인적으로 알 수 있는 기회도 제공합니다. 각 기여자는 자신의 개성을 글쓰기 및 프레젠테이션 스타일에 적용합니다. 시리즈 내의 각 주제에는 비디오를 포함하여 이와 같은 자체 블로그 게시물이 있습니다. 시리즈의 다른 모든 주제는 아래에 링크되어 있습니다. 이 비디오를 시청하고 블로그 게시물을 읽으면서 더 많은 지식을 얻고, 노출되지 않았을 수 있는 주제를 탐색하고, 자신과 주변 사람들이 더 건강하고 행복한 관계를 맺을 수 있도록 힘을 실어주기를 바랍니다. 시간을 내어 이러한 중요한 문제에 대한 교육, 인식 및 이해를 심화시켜 주셔서 감사합니다. 

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자기 규제

Hey there! It’s Brit again. I work for YWCA Spokane as an Associate Therapist. At the time of my writing this, we are currently working remotely so we can practice safe social distancing during COVID-19. This is a very stressful and anxiety-provoking time for a lot of us–and even when we don’t have an international pandemic happening, there are going to be days when we feel overwhelmed by life. Whether we have a history of trauma, struggle with our mental health, or just have a bad day, it’s good to know how to re-center ourselves. That’s where grounding techniques can come in. If you want to watch the video version of this, you can find it here. 

So, what is grounding, and how does it work?

“Grounding” simply means bringing ourselves back into the present as balanced as we can be. In order to help us understand how this works, we need to know a little bit about our nervous system. The nervous system has two main parts: sympathetic and parasympathetic. If your body was a car, the sympathetic system would be the gas pedal, and the parasympathetic would be the brakes. Our nervous system is responsible for keeping us safe and responding to danger, so we want it to work.

Say, for example, you’re hiking in the woods and you see a bear. How might that feel? Racing heart, rapid breathing, sweating, the feeling of needing to run, fight, 또는 play dead. That’s our fight-or-flight system at work. In this situation, the bear would be the trigger. Not everyone responds to triggers the same way, and one person might have different responses at different times. We can have any combination of responses. Triggers are things that might push on our gas pedal, while grounding techniques can tap on the brakes. One of my coworkers made more content about trauma and the brain–if you want more information about this, you can access that here.

To the right is a little doodle I made that might help explain different trauma responses and how grounding can help. I drew mine as a spectrum from “hot” responses to “cold/checked out” responses. Let’s go over each section real quick.

“Hot” Responses:

• Feeling “amped up”
• Rapid breathing
• Sweating
• Increased heart rate
• Hypervigilance (that constantly looking over your shoulder feeling)
• Decision fatigue

“Cold” or checked-out responses:

• Dissociation or feeling like you’re on autopilot
• Numbness
• Disconnected
• Seeing the world through a window rather than being fully present
• Decision fatigue

You might have noticed the term “decision fatigue” in both lists. We use this term when talking about that feeling you get when you just can’t possibly make any more choices. My example of this is when I’ve had a long day at work (working in trauma means that sometimes we’re pretty exhausted at the end of a day) and have to stop at the grocery store to get something simple like pasta sauce. Should be easy, right? But there I am, in the pasta sauce aisle, looking at twelve shelves of options and feeling like it’s impossible to pick which one to buy. That’s decision fatigue! It can be very unhelpful to experience decision fatigue, especially if we’re in a situation that isn’t safe, we have kids around we have to take care of, or we’re doing something that requires our attention, like driving.

Mindfulness/”Wise mind” 

• Present
• Aware
• Able to make decisions
• Able to self-regulate

Being in a mindful state, as balanced between hypervigilance and dissociation as we are able to be, means that we are still aware of what’s happening around us but we feel stable enough to move through it. This is the goal of grounding techniques! It doesn’t mean that all of our feelings go away, and we might still feel the stress or anxiety to a degree. The purpose of grounding is to get us to a place where we can move through the moment as safely as possible. 

So how do we do this?

Fortunately, there are a few hacks we can use to help ourselves feel more centered. A good tip is to practice some of them before you find yourself in a stressful situation. That way, we’ll be more prepared and can pull them up more easily.

Breathing Exercises

One of the first hacks is doing some intentional deep breathing. Most of us aren’t using our full lung capacity, so it might take a bit of practice to get the hang of these–that’s totally fine! Just do the best you can. If you need to modify any of these suggestions, please do that for yourself.  

• #1: 8-count breaths
  • Breathe in, counting to eight.
  • Hold the breath, counting to three.
  • Release the breath, counting to eight.
  • Repeat as many times as needed (for me, it’s usually three).

• #2: Tiered breaths
  • Breathe in, counting to three.
  • Hold, counting to three.
  • Breathe in again, counting to three.
  • Hold again, counting to three.
  • Breathe in again, counting to three.
  • Breathe out completely.

Muscle Relaxation

Another way to re-center is to target muscle groups that might be holding tension. Again, these methods can be adapted to whatever you are able to do or that works best for your situation. 

• #3: Muscle tension & relaxation, two ways
  • Method 1: progressive
    • Starting at one end of your body (your feet or your head, usually), focus on one muscle group/body part at a time.
    • With your in-breath, flex or tense up the muscles in that area.
    • With your out-breath, release them.
    • Continue until you’ve done your whole body (or as much as you’re able)

• • Method 2: all at once
    • With your in-breath, tense/flex all the muscles in your body that you can.
    • With your out-breath, release them.

Sensory 

Intentional sensory mindfulness can be really helpful if we’re feeling overwhelmed. Use as many senses as you can, or just pick one. The idea is to focus all of our attention on a limited sensory experience. Don’t be afraid to get creative!

• #4: Using the five senses
  • Some examples of how this can be done:
    • Find 5 things you can see, 4 things you can hear, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste
    • Pick a color or shape, and find everything around you that falls in that category
    • Touch something very warm or very cool (be careful not to burn yourself!)
    • Close your eyes and listen to loud music. Focus on the lyrics or instruments.
    • Put your bare feet on the cool floor or in the grass outside.
    • Close your eyes and inhale a pleasant or familiar smell.
    • Find something with an interesting texture (a soft blanket, a wool sweater, a pet, bricks or concrete, etc). Close your eyes and focus on the feel of it.

Safe place

Sometimes, the situation we’re in feels so unsafe that grounding to the present doesn’t seem possible. It’s ok to take a brief moment with a small mental vacation. My “safe place” is a small beach inlet my late grandfather used to bring us to when I was a child. When I imagine it, I think of the smell of the ocean, the feel of the sand under my feet, and the sound of waves and seagulls. 

• #5: Safe place
  • Take a breath.
  • If needed, close your eyes.
  • Imagine a place that’s safe for you. It can be real or fictional.
  • Use whatever senses you need to make it feel more real:
  • What does it smell like?
  • What’s the temperature? Is it warm or cool?
  • What can you hear?
  • Take a moment or two to enjoy the safe place.
  • Take another deep breath, and wiggle your fingers or toes to bring yourself back.

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Written content and video for this topic within the Prevention at Home series provided by YWCA Spokane staff member, Brit Wilson.

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집에서 예방 학습을 계속하세요!

다음 블로그 게시물을 방문하고 집에서의 예방 시리즈의 다른 비디오를 시청하여 자신과 주변 사람들에게 힘을 실어주는 여정에 대한 더 많은 주제를 살펴보세요.

1. YWCA 스포케인의 서비스
2. 친밀한 파트너 가정 폭력이란 무엇입니까?
3. 위험 신호와 관계 스펙트럼
4. 존중, 경계 및 동의
5. 청소년 가정폭력
6. 왜 그들은 머물거나 돌아가는가?
7. 트라우마와 뇌
8. 안전 계획
9. 자가 관리
10. 자기 규제
11. 친구를 돕는 방법

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평생 교육을 위한 외부 리소스

YWCA Spokane 직원은 귀하의 교육을 향상시키기 위해 다음 외부 링크를 수집했습니다.

• 평등 대 공평
• 동의 차
• 공감 대 동정 - 브레네 브라운
• 자기 관리 TedTalks
• 자녀와 대화하기: 동의와 건강한 관계 
• 여성폭력, 그것은 남성의 문제 - 잭슨 카츠
• 우리는 라이온스 스킵 말리(Lions-Skip Marley)입니다

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YWCA 스포캔이 당신을 위해 여기 있습니다

귀하 또는 귀하가 아는 사람이 친밀한 파트너의 가정 폭력으로 인해 영향을 받은 경우, 전화를 통해 24시간 헬프라인 서비스를 통해 항상 비밀 옹호자의 도움을 받을 수 있다는 점을 알아 두십시오. 509-326-2255, 이메일을 보내다 help@ywcaspokane.org, 또는 문자 메시지 509-220-3725. 

코로나19 팬데믹 기간 동안 YWCA Spokane을 통해 추가 서비스를 이용하는 방법에 대해 자세히 알아보려면 다음을 방문하세요. ywcaspokane.org/services.